More Rhode Island'isms

I got this from a Myspace bulletin from my dear friend Aubrey, a former RI'er now living in San Diego. But I will tell you all right now- I've never had a boyfriend named Vinnie (and I don't ever plan on it)

You Know You're From Rhode Island When... You had a "wickit" good time at the beach. When you hear an amazing fact your immidiate reply is "no suh!" You can't drive two miles with out seeing a Dunkin Donuts. You consider a car journey of longer than one hour a day trip. You can you curse in Italian. You own garden tools from Job Lot. You have tried to drive the measured mile in less then 45 seconds. You have used the expression "Not For Nuthin" or "bubbla". You serve bread with every meal. You load up on milk and bread before a snowstorm. You feel compelled to hear at least one weather report a day. You have pulled out of a sidestreet and used your car to block oncoming traffic so you could make a left-hand turn (aka Cranston Jam). You own at least one coffee table book with a picture of a lighthouse on it. You've boasted about the money you saved at the Christmas Tree Shop. Your first live concert was at The Civic Center or Rocky Point. You have close relatives who work for the state. You have used a demolished landmark when giving directions. You have slammed on your breaks to discourage a tailgater. You know what a burger "The Newport Creamery Way" is. You have dated a girl named Brenda or a guy named Vinnie. You have used the breakdown lane on 95 to pass someone. You have driven more than 5 miles out of your way to save less than two bucks. You been on a RIPTA bus less than 12 times in the past 6 years. You know what a "governor-preferred" plate is. You know someone who works for the Registry. You've asked your mechanic for an inspection sticker even though your car failed to pass. You have a degree from RIC, CCRI or URI. You think vodka and Del's is a great combination. You've borrowed dealer plates from a friend. You know how to pronounce Pawtucket, Cowesett, Usqepaug, and Narragansett. You can recognize a Cranston accent. You think high hair, gold chains, and gum go together. You drop the "w" in Greenwich, Kingstown, and Warwick. You celebrate St. Joseph's Day and know what a "zeppolla" is. You know what "ProJo" stands for. You always start giving directions by saying, "Well, you get on 95" You know where "NiRoPe" comes from. You know what "John from Alpert's" sounds like. You can recite the license plates of all your family members and friends. You know what a "package store" is. You think lots of gold jewelery looks great on the beach. Your favorite expressions are, "Are you serious?", "Wicked", and "You know what I'm saying?" You know there's a West End but not a West Providence. You think banana, vanilla, and idea all end in "r". You put vinegar on your french fries. You've gone to Cumbie's for milk or gas. You know that there is never any school in Fosta-Glosta when it snows. The girl you ended up marrying lived no more than 6 blocks from where you grew up. You've converted the basement of your house into an apartment. You call spaghetti sauce, "gravy." You tell friends that something is "on special", instead of on sale. You order an iced coffee in December. You read the wedding announcements in the Sunday Pro-Jo and recognize at least 3 couples. You know someone who knew the Farrelly brothers when they lived around here. You know exactly which parts of Dumb and Dumber, There's Something About Mary, Meet Joe Black and Amistad were filmed in RI, and you can tell someone exactly where that is. You know what the Coffee Cup Salute is, and who does it every morning. You grew up with everyone you see at Stop and Shop. You know where South County is, even though it doesn't exist. You and everyone you know are either Italian or Irish, or both. You've never been farther south than Jersey, and not farther West than there, either, but are planning to move to Florida as soon as you turn 60. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Rhode Island.

5 comments

  1. Anonymous9:30 AM

    That was pretty funny Melissa. I guess if I were from RI, I would be like that. Hope your doing fine.
    I am starting to use Wicked a lot more than I ever have.

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  2. Anonymous9:22 PM

    Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

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  3. Anonymous10:29 PM

    nice article. I would love to follow you on twitter.

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